Here It Comes..

Broken Social Scene - Windsurfing Nation

December. All I can think of is getting sick, which I think I'm doing now. Hopefully not. Oh yah, yay! November's over. No more college apps and shit.

This week is the last week before Holiday Break. After that, everything will zoom by, and whoa, out of high school. I wonder what's going to happen..

I haven't been up to much. Nothing new. I just go to school, go to work, do homework, and go out now and then. I want to start doing things, though, like learn how to cook something. That was my goal in the summer, but I didn't do it. -___-

I've recently REALLY been wanting shoes. Well, I always did, but I just gave up before cuz I didn't want to use money, but now, I REALLY want them. =[ Nooo. I have to save up money. Finally almost back to 500.. =/ I was going to have over 1k once this year was over, but I didn't take Christmas into account. Who knew it was so damn expensive? (I really didn't think about it. Shush.)

I hate driving in the rain. I'd rather walk, or, more like me, twirl down the street, in the rain.

I really need to raise my grades. *bang bang*

I guess that starts with doing homework (it more starts with going to class, but that's only 1st period that I need to work on :D). Laaaate.

Scrubs *hart*. Check that shit on the side menu.

I keep finding myself at the end of the week thinking, This was a horrible week. That sucks.

Michelle Branch! Whoo~

Where're my packages? Rawr.

I have to go to church today and then to dinner... Maybe I'll just drive myself so I can go home.

Whoa. Alicia Keys. What happened to her? Last I saw her in anything, it was in some horrible music video singing as a featured artist.

Some people want it all, but I don't want nothing at all, if it ain't you, baby, if I ain't got you, baby.

I swear I look like Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer right now.

YUP! I'm sick, though you shouldn't be at all surprised.

I feel like smashing someone with my elbow

Justin Timberlake - SexyBack
(This is going to be on repeat allllllll day, cuz I have to make up a dance, or at least most of one, by tomorrow. Ah shiiieettt. *elbow*)

I just wasted about 3-4 hours of my Sunday, and I want them back. *elbow* I just chipped off some of my dignity by trying to be anything but what I want to be: a concise, blunt bitch. *elbow* Even now, I probably wouldn't be able to say no. *elbow*

Why the heck does JT start singing on the 8/8 count rather than 1/8? That little shit.

Screw it. It's sprinkling, it's gloomy, I'm in a bad mood, and I'm sick of SexyBack when homecoming hasn't even started. I'm gonna treat myself to some jazz. I think I deserve it.

Jazz singers totally understand chicks.

I had some green tea earlier. I feel kinda better cuz I woke up all snotty and funky in the throat, but I'm in a horrible, horrible mood.

And I'm a terrible person.

My emotions always turn into anger. I don't know why. I'm actually feeling a little sad, and a lot disappointed, but it just evolves into anger. So rawr. *elbow*

I'm gonna start staying indoors, with my J3 reader constantly by my side. Yah, SAT II's. I'm gonna get fucked over so well.

I want to rearrange my room. I hate how my couch isn't facing my computer. I also still need to hook up my stereo. This whole turning-on-the-computer-just-to-listen-to-music thing is not working out. Like now. I totally want to turn up the bass on my jazz, lie in bed or on my couch, and chill out. I could do that now, I know, but it's just not the same. When the computer's on, I don't like leaving it on for no reason. Blehhhhhh.

I still haven't eaten. *elbow*

I want to go play with my SLR.

Why am I so sensitive? *elbow*

I will save up $1,000 by the end of this year. I must.

You make me smile with my heart..

Ta-ta.

A Good Week

Mexican Institute of Sound - Mirando a las Muchachas
(No, it's not mariachi or any other horrible Mexican music you may think it is. It's actually more.. like electronic.)

I didn't love this week. First week of school with a Monday. Blech. My Bio class has a semi-permanent substitute, and she's nice and all, but she does the most useless shit ever. "So, what does science mean to you?" -_- I did horribly on my free responses in Calc BC. I'm the type of person who learns something for the year, then the next, clean slate. I remember the easy stuff, but I forgot volume, not to mention volume of a cross section, all the theorems, blah. Fuck you, Riemann. *shank* I swear, I'll find his grave and obliterate it. I keep seeing some motherfucker at school, and for some reason, I keep smiling and waving. Fuck that shit. (Ooo. Getting angry now.)

I started working part time, so I have more time for better things. I didn't need it, cuz I was still managing to get everything done, and I only stayed up out of boredom, but now, I have time for other things, like hanging out with the girls, or taking my mom out for lunch. And with the assurance that my mom doesn't have cancer, this has been a good week.

I got a Digital SLR. I'll post more about it later. Hopefully with some interesting pictures.

I feel like I have so much hw. Why? It's senior year, dammit! Gyar.

Hi.

Ken Oak Band - Summer's Kiss
(I love them so dearly.)

I was talking to a guy recently. At first, I was really skeptical, and I didn't really care much for it. Me care about guys? Not really. After a while, though, I started to like him a bit. Okay, I don't wanna explain the whole thing, so in the end: failed. Things just never work out for me with guys. I have really bad luck or something. Maybe I keep choosing the wrong ones, or maybe I drive them away. Don't know. I'm not trying to sound dramatic or anything, but really, why doesn't any of it work? I actually started liking him, and things were just lax... but I guess it was too laidback for me. Mehhhh. I need to go find some older guys. Holler at me. (I keed. Get away.)

School's alright. It kinda picked up work-wise, but I'm still handling it okay. The only thing that tired me out was work, but starting this week, I'm only working 2-3 days per week, so things should get better.

I retook my senior portrait today cuz they lost people's pictures or something. I didn't really like how I looked, but I just took it anyway. He said I was taking great pictures, but I'm sure they're required to say that.

I want to buy a new vacuum. I'm thinking of that one on the commercial where that British guy talks about bad suction. *Google*... Ah. Dyson. I also found out that they're hundreds of dollars. :D!... Dammit. I hate my vacuum. Maybe next year.. after senior year and my Japan trip. Ack ack ack.

I've had a deviantART account for a while, but I only just started doing stuff on there last week. My stuff sucks though, and I don't have much on there yet, but feel free to check it out. It's in my links area.

I'm gonna vacuum my car with my shit vacuum. Yayuh. (Or I'll watch movies like I planned to do today...)


Tch.

Thoughts About the Mom

Umbrellas - Tests on My Heart
("And I don't want you to save me. What if you did? You'd succeed, and you'd be bored, and leave. I'd be back at square one, and it's such a bad place to begin." Yes, boys suck.)

Yesterday, I went shopping with my mom. She is the perfect shopping buddy. I know, she pays for my clothes, but not only that, she's not the type to linger around you, making you rush, or making you feel guilty for making her wait. She does her own shopping, but we're still able to help each other out. I especially like helping her.. (My mom has some odd fascination with lace. I'll just blame the Vietnamese genetics.) Anyway, we spent a lot of money, but I also bought her clothes and Jamba Juice. It wasn't anything in comparison to what she spent on me for clothes alone, but I still liked doing it anyway. It was my first time really getting her anything since I got my job. I buy her food and such, but I guess clothes are a bigger deal. When we were heading home from Oakridge, I was just sitting in the van, thinking, When she dies, I'm going to be so sad. I don't know why. I just thought about our bonding times, and how we barely argue anymore (We used to argue a lot more.). I guess I just came to thinking about that cuz we went to Sactown recently, and my grandpa has changed so much. He went from being jolly and healthy to scared and pale, since he moved to Sactown (Something we shouldn't have done). I got scared when I saw him, not cuz he was scary looking, but cuz I knew that soon.. So, I got to thinking about my mom. Everything I'm proud of about myself, I got from her. She's made me into the person I am, and I'm glad of it. When my morals get muddled, she helps clear them up (Such as the "Guys suck" morality). And no one cuts my hair like she does (I wouldn't really know since she's cut my hair all my life, but I like the way she cuts my hair). Imagining my life without her, I feel like I'd crash and burn. I wash the vegetables, she cuts them (I have no skills with the knife whatsoever. Fucking tomatoes.). She washes the clothes, I hang, dry, and fold them (Course, most of this is stuff that we did at the old house. Now that my unemployed aunt lives with us, she does pretty much everything.). I really don't know what I'm going to do without my mom. She tells people we're like sisters, and though it sounded funny to me at first, we really are, except that respect is still intact. Despite all my upsets and disappointments, she still manages to be proud of me. I never understood why, but I guess it's just a motherly thing. I'm really going to miss all the times we've had, and will have, together. It scares me to think that she won't always be here.

I'm gonna stop thinking about that. Gah.

I have to take my senior portrait again cuz their camera messed up or something. I have another chance to not do my hair and throw own some make up.. maybe I should actually try this time. Who knows.

I love Ken Oak Band. The lyrics to their newest song, taken from their site:
"trampoline"

i saw her bouncing on a trampoline
the grass was blue and the sky was green
angels' dust on the tips of her wings
it's like you've never seen
and you forget to breathe at all

her hair was flowin'
a cool wind was blowin'
i said 'hello there miss...'
you know you've really got a lovely smile
so would you give me a kiss
if i leaned in like this
i won't tell nobody at all
no i won't tell nobody at all

i could be your fantasy
all but the crown and cape
if you can show me some reality
there's only so much i can take
we can sip on some mushrooms in tea
anything you please
it doesn't faze me at all

my thoughts were clearing
her tone was endearing
she said 'you're good at this...'
my dreams were truthful to me all the while
so would you give me a kiss
if i leaned in like this
i won't tell nobody at at all
no i won't tell nobody at all
no i won't tell nobody

then we stopped dancing
your hands in my hands and
my focus on your lips
and it's hard to resist when you're looking like this
the shape in your dress isn't too hard to miss
thunder and lightning and all this excitement is making me blind
but i won't tell nobody at all
no i won't tell nobody at all
no i won't tell nobody at all
no i won't tell nobody at all

Easy Peasy

Jon B. - I Do

(Love the old R&B. Not like now.)

love them.

I'm a senior. It's hit me, but not that hard. I guess once events start happening (homecoming, rallies, etc.), then I'll realize it more, but as of now, my senior year is just.. whatever. It's easy, so easy that I still have free time even though I work 3 days, 5 days a week. I'm gonna be part-time starting next month or something though because of homecoming, and from there, I'm permanently part-time, so that's a whole bunch of free time. I still hate getting up in the morning.

Just came back from shopping-pho-dessert outing with Lisa and Christine. It's good to just hang out.. but man, am I full.

I have nothing else (that I want to say), and I want to keep my posts short, so I'm out.

Victoria Loves Me

.. And I should really be doing homework. -_- (Note: This is old. It was my first, and thus far, my only, attempt at vector art.)

Why, Hello

So here's the quiz:
Put your music player on shuffle.
Press forward for each question.
Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn't make sense. You'll be surprised though.
NO CHEATING!

How am I feeling today?
Tilly and The Wall - The Freest Man
I guess I'm feeling free?

Will I get far in life?
Regina Spektor - Chemo Limo
Apparently not...

How do my friends see me?
Pierre-Jean Gidon - Just The Way You Are
Aww.

Where will I get married?
Athletic Mic League - Trouble
I guess I won't get married. T_T

What is my best friend's theme song?
Snow Patrol - Ways & Means
So much for that. This is ending up to be a very sad quiz..

What is the story of my life?
Tilly and The Wall - Ice Storm, Big Gust, and You
It seems like my life isn't going to be all sunny days.

What was high school like?
Bright Eyes - Bowl of Oranges
Cuz it was fruity and juicy?

How can I get ahead in life?
Fall of Transition - Violent (Acoustic)
So.. kill everyone in my way?

What is the best thing about me?
Clazziquai - Flower
... My flower? I beg to differ.

What was today like?
Muse - Dead Star
I'm beginning to think that I listen to horrible music.

What is in store for this weekend?
The Pussycat Dolls - Wait A Minute
Seems like it means my weekend will get put off, unless I go by its lyrics and I'll be a gold diggin' slut. I don't know which I prefer.

What song describes my parents?
Taking Back Sunday - Eleven
If I go by the lyrics, it's pretty sad. " Maybe it wasn't good enough, but I gave you all I could."

How is my life going?
Phantom Planet - Rise the Setting Star
Seems like it's saying my life has been a waste of time. Eek.

What song will they play at my funeral?
Jimmy Eat World - 23
That makes me happy.

How does the world see me?
Maria Taylor - Speak Easy
As an honest person who can speak their mind? Though, this song is actually about love. Iono.

Will I have a happy life?
Natalie Imbruglia - Satisfied
That sounds good, though most up to this point hasn't sounded great. So, the song is actually about trying to be satisfied, and how it doesn't work out. Ah, that's more like it.

What do my friends really think of me?
The Pussycat Dolls - Don't Cha
Apparently, they don't think I'm hot like them, freak like them, raw like them, or fun like them.

Do people secretly lust after me?
Murs - Transitionz As A Ridah
I guess not.

How can I make myself happy?
Some song from the Love Story In Harvard OST
... Go to Harvard? Well, that sucks for me.

What should I do with my life?
Eric Benet & Tamia - Spend My Life With You
But just who is this "you?"

Will I ever have children?
Kanye West - Addiction
I guess I'm gonna have a whole bunch due to an addiction to.. sex?

What will you name them?
Say Anything - Spidersong
I have no clue how this makes sense.

Who will you marry?
Aaliyah - If Your Girl Only Knew
Even if I were lesbian/bi, Aaliyah's dead! ... So is it doom, or fortune? This quiz won't stick to one thing.

Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Dashboard Confessional - Rapid Hope Loss
I hate this quiz.

How will you die?
Snow Patrol - Chocolate
I don't get this either. I'll die.. trying to get back the one I love? ... Yeah, this quiz sucks.

Summer's Here; Update Time

Daphne Loves Derby - Hammers and Hearts
(I remember when this album came out last summer. Yay for summer songs. It makes me want to go to the beach.)

It's the day after the last day of school, and I'm sitting on my computer, blogging. It sounds pretty lame, I know, but it's awesome to actually have the time to do tedious crap like this. I HAVE NOTHING TO DO! and it's damn awesome. =D This summer, the only thing I really have to do is work. I'm currently working at Khai Tri, a tutoring center. I've only been working with little kids so far, but when the summer tutoring starts, I don't know whether I'll still be teaching little kids or not. Much to people's surprise, I can work pretty well with little kids. I guess everyone thought I'd unleash my wrath on them, but I'm actually pretty lenient. Maybe too lenient. I'm trying to be stricter on them, but I'm still nice to them. My boss and the guy who manages the center I work at tell me not to interact with them at all and not to be friends with them, and they think I do it a lot, but... they're kids! What am I supposed to do o_o. Yeah, when they're bad, I'm harsh, but otherwise, I can still be nice, right? There aren't really any fully bad kids, though I do have the ones I don't like. I think there's only one. I forgot his name cuz I only taught him 2 or 3 times, but he tries to be such a smartass. Ooo~! You can multiply and do this worksheet in less than a minute! I don't care. One thing I noticed with kids since I took this job is that they're so damn competitive with each other. They're always trying to brag, get the last word in their little arguments, etc. They always have that "Oh yeah?" attitude. For example..

Boy 1: Noooo. I don't want to do anymore work. Me: You have to.

Boy 2: Can you give me 5 more homeworks?
Me: Uh, sure.
Boy 1: I want 10 more!
Boy 2: I want a hundred!
Boy 1: A zillion!

What kind of person asks for "a zillion" homework assignments? -_- In this job, I have to make sure I don't feed their damn egos. Gotta humble them -_-. However, there are the kids who need to get built up. Actually, there's only one. Her name's Christina. I analyze my kids, and from the start, I knew that this girl had little to no friends. I always felt bad for her, but I can't really force kids to play with her. There's one specific girl in my class who just outright dislikes her named Brittany. She's kind of like.. the popular girl in my class. She's pretty, not very smart, talkative, etc. She calls Christina "stupid," "idiot," and other condescending things. I always punish her for it, but she does it anyway. I'll admit, Christina isn't my brightest student, but she's a hard worker and understands things, though at a slower pace. Just the other day, Brittany had gum and was sharing it with everyone, but when Christina asked for some..

Christina: Teacher, I asked Brittany for a piece of gum, and she said no.
Me: Why not?
Christina: She doesn't like me.
Me: ... You know what? Let's go buy some. Hurry up.

So I grabbed her hand and we ran out to the water store to get some 30 cent Juicy Fruit. When we got back, there were about 5 minutes till break was over, and we got back to tutoring. During the 2nd half of tutoring, Christina called me over and gave me this:

Sure, the spelling is pretty awful (tecker = teacher), and the drawing makes me look like some Play-Do ... thing, but when she gave this to me, I felt both good and bad. I felt good that she was so happy because of my small 30 cent-worth gesture, but I felt bad that I was the only friend she had at that pastel purple walled prison. Another day, during break time, she came into my room with a smile on her face..

Christina: Teacher. I brought chips today, and they're all gone. Everyone ate them.
Me: .. Oh.
Christina: Everybody liked them. Now I know what chips they like. *smiles*
Me: .. Oh, that's cool.

Poor girl. She doesn't realize that everyone is just using her for her food. I think the reason why I feel bad isn't just because it's sad, but she reminds me of myself when I was younger. A lot. You all know that I hated Liberty Baptist School, the shithole I went to from preschool to 6th grade, and most of you roughly know why. I guess I want to save that girl from being a depressed, resentful bitch later in her life, like me. -_- Anyway, I was considering getting a different job cuz I didn't like the circumstances of this one (can't work overtime or on weekends, can't get extra shifts, etc.), but now I think I'm actually kinda needed. Being needed holds me back. We'll see.

Other than work, I have no actual plans for the whole summer. However, in about 3 days (Monday), I'm going to Japan for a week. Random, eh? I'm going with my Japanese class. It's gonna be awesome. I'd plot out the whole agenda, but it's damn long. I'll just save it for when I come back. The only thing I'm not looking forward to is when I first meet my host family. I'll have to introduce myself, give them gifts (Doesn't sound bad, right? Wrong. Giving gifts takes about 5-10 minutes with Japanese people cuz of their damn honorable manners.), and getting myself settled. Otherwise, it should be fun. Look forward to the update on that.

Nothing else to blog about, that, and I don't care cuz it's taking me forever to do this post cuz I'm doing other stuff, so I'll just end it here with a list of my summer plans. Peace.

-learn how to cook at least 5 dishes well
-run tons
-get a lot better at badminton
-get free
-go to the beach
-save $1,000
-get back to at least the level of piano skills i had when i left
-hose down those damn birds outside my house
-roadtrip to SoCal (unlikely, I know)

Sundays

John Coltrane - Everytime We Say Goodbye

On Sundays, I feel so lazy, eager, aware, lost.. it all just dissolves together and I get really dull, calm, and pretty emotionless. Today, it's another one of those "Now would be a good time to have a boyfriend" moments. There's someone in particular, but eh. It's strange though, I barely even liked this person, but I still miss them anyway. I guess it's cuz of the lack thereof that I notice how convenient it was. Not just "convenient," but just nice in general. It wasn't serious, but I guess I got a little attached anyway. I also think it's the fear that no one can like me. I don't even know why this person liked me, if they did at all. Er, let's say, I don't know why they were interested at all.

I just find it interesting how in such little time, there's already things that pop up to remind me.

I have horrible timing. My birthday? Erg.. this sucks. I digress.

Anyway, it's only a couple weeks till I go to Japan. I expect it to be fun, but I'm just scared of talking to my host's family. For 3 days, I'll be staying in a hotel with the class, but for 4 days, I'll be alone with a Japanese student and his/her family. One thing that makes me worry most is how I'll be showering. I think I can manage with the bucket and water faucet, but I will probably take a long time. I hate taking long showers at people's houses, or in this case... baths?, cuz I feel like I'm being a bother. What if I can't eat their food? I think I should be okay, but what if they bust out the eel or something? I've never eaten eel before, I don't think. I'd just eat it to be polite, but what if I try and I eat it wrong or I can't swallow it? Ahh. I think the general fear is not to be rude. That'd kill. Some people are worried about us running into tsuyu season (rainy season in the Asian area.. rain, heat, humidity, blah blah), but I actually want to experience it. It seems interesting. And if you know me, I love rain. I love walking/ running in it, so tsuyu would actually be interesting for me.

So I totally forgot this window was open, and I'm too lazy to blog now. Later days.

I Need To Stop

This Day and Age - History is Falling for Science

After going to Eastridge with my mom today, we ate at In-N-Out. I told my mom to get a table, and when I found her after getting a drink, I wished I chose the table and she got the drink. She chose a table next to a couple of girls who were talking loudly and it wasn't a nice place to relax, which was what my mom had in mind cuz only I was eating, but she wanted to eat-in anyway to just hang out. While my mom and I were eating and talking about summer and trips (Japan :D, possibly Europe next year, L.A. this year cuz of my uncle and his family, blah), I constantly heard the girls next to me cursing and... just being stupid. For example, they were talking about.. iono, probably making out or something, and they were talking about how their lips were big in a positive way. I looked over and saw one pouting her lips and using her hands to make them poutier as she talked about how they weren't thick, but they were nice or something (many "or something"s cuz I didn't exactly want to listen, but how could I not when they were saying it for everyone to hear and I was right next to them?). Man, how self-centered can people get? I tried to just keep talking to my mom to tune them out (and hopefully mute them for my mom), but contantly, they kept talking aloud about boys, how they drink (and drive simulaneously. Idiots.), how they do drugs, etc. I really should've just moved, but I don't know. I just didn't. *shrug*

I really don't want to be racist, but whenever I run into this kind of stuff... well, how can I not be? It's always the same people. I'm not saying only this race of people get drunk and get high, but only this race of people talk about it so stupidly. (I heard a part about how one of them drove home drunk, got home drunk, and talked to her parents drunk. Stupid.) Or, maybe it's just that only this race can manage to piss me off so damn easily. (I was annoyed prior to looking at them, but right when I looked at them, it just justified both my feeling of annoyance and my racism.)

I got my passport today. FUCK! WHY CAN'T PEOPLE GET MY NAME RIGHT?! IT'S FUCKING MICHELLE THIEN HUONG DUONG! How the fuck do you mess that up? What's more, how the fuck do you mess up only my middle name, but not my last name? My name appears as "Michelle Thienhoung Duong." And since when did my middle name become one word? Can't they see the fucking space in between?! Jeez.

Hmm.. I think I'm pissed cuz AP's are this week.

RAWR!

Yamapi <3>

I'm Alive

The Ken Oak Band - The Biggest Problem
(Check them out at www.kenoakband.com and buy Symposium)

Yeah, it's been a very long while since I've updated this thing. Spring break's almost over, and I'm not gonna try and update for the past months. I'll just post about what I've done this week.

Almost every day, I went to tutoring for Calc AB at school (so much for spring break, eh?) to do multiple packets and such. It wasn't that bad since we were only doing hw and doing it at our own discretion (at least for the most part). The only crap thing was how long it really took. By the end of it, everyone was just sick of math. Even multiplying was strictly out of the question.

Last Friday, when spring break first started, I went home to sleep while everyone went out. I was sick (and still am a bit) and tired, but I woke up later and met them up at a park where we played at a playground. After, we went to Milpitas Golf Land. It's been very long. I played the motion sensor games, of course, including Para Para Paradise. I failed after Popteen. Shameful, I know. Cindy and I tried finding the DDR machines, but we could only find this rip of DDR, In The.. something 2. I don't remember, but it sucked. Death to it. On our way out, we spotted the DDR machines in the food area. We didn't expect it to be there. Tricky bastards. After that, we went to Chris' and just hung out.

Hmm.. Tuesday, I asked some people to go swimming at Chris' apartment. When we finally got in, it was ICE COLD. We didn't swim for even 10 minutes. I sort of got used to it, but I was still pretty cold, so I got out, and we all ended up just playing some games and doing nothing. After, I went to Eastridge with Chris and Kenneth, then did some more nothing.

Wednesday was the BBQ. We couldn't think of any nice parks with BBQ grills, so we ended up going to Lake Cunningham. I hated that place, and after the BBQ, I hate it more. To get to our table, you had to cross a field of mud, geese, geese crap, water, and fruit fly infested mud and geese crap. The picnic itself was okay. We finally decided to get out of there and play at a nice park. We went to the park we went to on Friday and after some water balloons, had a fun game of football. It was girls vs. boys, tackle. We didn't really tackle each other though, it was more.. just jumping on each other, I guess. It was fun though. I didn't even do that much, but I managed to get two bruises on my right arm. (You can't really see it in the picture, but eh.) The one on my forearm, I got from trying to block/ kinda stiff-arm Kenneth, and the other is a mystery. The next day, I was sore, like everyone else. I was still sore till Friday, but I think I'm fine today. After, we went to my house, but I fell asleep. When I woke up, they were ready to leave. I'm a horrible host, I know.

Friday, Kim and I went to SJSU to watch The Ken Oak Band perform at Relay for Life. It was a free show. Before they performed, there was a hip-hop group. They were alright, I guess, but I wasn't really paying attention, so blah. When we first got there, I spotted Ken Oak, the singer, cellist, and other guitarist. I tried to talk to him, but I didn't know if I was bothering him and I was pretty nervous, so I just said I'd come watch him later and left. Of course I left after taking a picture with him. When we took the picture, he sort of fell/ leaned on me. I realized he had a cane to support him and help him walk. I didn't get to ask him what happened though. At the start of the performance, it was just these two guys, Kim, and I. The guys were wearing brown and Kim and I were wearing green. We could've made a tree. :D I talked to the guy next to me. He seemed nice, but when I asked if he'd sing along, he said he wasn't a bopper. I don't think that's bopper o_O. And he actually did sing along later. Pretty silly. During the performance, he was switching from his guitar to the cello (or was it the other way around..), and he sort of landed on his leg I guess, and I noticed him wince. He had to pause for a while, then he started to play. Must've been bad, whatever his injury was, but I saw no cast. Anyhow, their show was really good. (I like the picture of them performing cuz they're both really into it :D) It matched the weather. It was off and on sunny, but calm. At one point, it was sprinkling while it was sunny. It was real movie-like weather, and their music is very mellow, so Kim and I were really just enjoying the whole show. I think one of my favorites was the first song they performed, "Summer Kisses," which is to be on their next album. It was about stars, galaxies, sky, stars, and stars. :D Just a lot of pretty lyrics. Ken Oak sang so prettily and I just kept watching him during the cello solos. He's really passionate when he plays, and this was just at a show with not even 10 people attending. Ed Gorski, the main guitarist who is left-handed, was the more comedic of the two during the performance. They're both pretty hot, talented, passionate, and just nice. At the end of the show, it was pretty much just those two guys, Kim, and I. People came and went in between, but at the end, it was pretty much just the four of us. After the show, I got to talk to Ed a bit and we took a picture. I didn't get to talk to their booking guy, Pete, but he's nice too (e-mail). Kim and I didn't have anywhere to go before the Key Club convention, so we stayed a bit. There was a lady showing people how to swing dance. By that point, Kim and I were known as the "two girls in green" or "the St. Patrick girls" or something. I don't know, but people needed partners and they also wanted more people to join in. We just weren't up for it, I guess. Even Ed told us to go swing as he was putting away equipment. Maybe I would've if I got to swing with Ed, but nah. I was still sore that day too. After a while, we left and headed for convention. We ended up just going up to our friends' hotel room. We ate their food and watched a movie while they were at convention, then Tracy, Dan, Kenneth, and Sarah snuck out. We hung out, Victoria came, we played a game of "I've never.." (1st: Sarah, 2nd: me, 3rd: Victoria; we were supposed to give them a dare, but the losers tried to reverse it on us and said that since we didn't do anything, we should be given the dare, so it ended with nothing being done by either sides), the rest of the people got out, hung out, Larry Bach came, hung out, got in trouble for being loud, dropped Larry off at his hotel, played Cranium, and went home. I got home at about 1:30 AM.

Today, I woke up at 3 PM after going to sleep at 5 AM (yeah, I shouldn't be blogging at 2 AM -_-), did some homework, and watched Silent Hill. It was pretty bad. I laughed at the corny, redundant lines, the simply stupid lines, and the bad acting. I think I jumped once, and that was relatively in the beginning. It was just when Rose, the mother and main character, tripped on a sewer cover or something. That was pretty much it. -_-

Now, I'm blogging. My spring break was pretty good overall. I'm content with it as it is, but I'm not content with how the end is coming. =( I hate school. I won't ever, ever love it. Tch. I may miss high school when I'm out, but I still won't love it.

Anyhow, I should go sleep and dream of Ken Oak Band, not Silent Hill. =( Sure, it wasn't exactly scary, but I don't like monsters nonetheless.

I don't know if I'll update soon after this, but check if you please.

February?!

The Like - June Gloom
(This song makes me wanna just... scream)

It's already February. Crazy. I hate how time goes by. T__T

Updates, updates. It's currently the season of Tet, as you probably already know. I didn't do anything. I went to church, and that's pretty much it. Boo. I don't know what's new.. actually, there's nothing. x_x Well, Duy's gonna be here for around a month coming this Friday. It's good since usually he only spends a week or something here then has to go back. Good stuff. Oh, I've started a little project. I'm trying to get the hang of vectors, and I have one in the works, but it's not from scratch. It's from an original picture. I'll put it up here once it's done. The main part of it's done, but it's not complete. Here's what a vector looks like:(CREDITS TO novenarik @ DEVIANTART) That's a very nice example of one, but it can get to simpler forms. Vector art actually does involve vectors, for you math-Physics junkies thinking this. It involves lines and all that crap. I just like the effect. Man, I wish I was an awesome artistic person, but I'm not. Maybe I can be with photo. We'll see. I just can't draw or make something up, but I think that I have an okay eye for spotting things out. Blah.

Recently, I've been hating Photo. That class is so... repetitive and boring, but recently, I've rediscovered my love for photography. Sure, the class still sucks, but I'm going to try and be more creative with my assignments and see if I can have fun with it. You can't take the cameras off campus, so it's hard, especially when you go to a school like Silver Creek and not Evergreen. I'm one of those.. urban/ architectural photographers. I like finding odd ways to look at structures, but Creek doesn't have much variety with structures. -_- Well, I'm still gonna do that shit. :D

What else..... I really feel like giving up, like trying is useless. Eeegad... I know it's bad, but I just... gah!!

FANTASTICS. It's pretty good this year. People are cooperating, getting along. No fights yet, though I had a small one. Meh. I don't even know the storyline, honestly, but the general topic is Ancient Civilizations (formerly Ancient Cities, but got changed, so I think we totally copied EVHS. Oh well.). Seniors - Greece, us Juniors - Atlantis, Sophomores - Egypt, Freshmen - ...China. Haha. It feels like I posted something about this already. Blah. I think we're all idiots for not choosing Japan. I think that's better than all of them, but Egypt's pretty good.

Badminton is a no-no. The gym's all messed up from that day with 90 mph winds, but even before that, I decided not to join. I'm fed up with being on the team, and the team itself. They can fuck themselves. =]

I've been feeling pretty... x_X.

I want some noodles. I don't know what else to update, so later. I really should just sleep. Bood <3

And That's All I Need

Lately I've been thinking so strangely about the clouds. And how they seem to slowly fade away, yeah. Maybe someday we will find a way to disappear, just me and you on silver lining dreams.

It's gonna rain. I think on Tet too. I like rain, but I hate wind + rain. I hate school + rain cuz the school always gets huge puddles and super muddy. I love you + me + rain. I don't love Tet parades + tons of people + rain. I love you. =]

I won't. Oh, I won't.

Yay for the Unknowns!

The Like - Too Late
(I love this song. I imagine girls rocking out to it in ballet. It'd be awesome if this kinda song was the song to dance to for the "all girls dance" in FANTASTICS. And you know there's always one that's at least mainly meant for girls. Some might argue it's too slow, but I think slower songs aren't that much more difficult to make a routine to.)

So, it's semester break, which means a 4 day weekend. Therefore, I don't have school tomorrow, which I didn't know until going out with some people today. Otherwise, I'd be sleeping, dreading tomorrow's return to hell, but no! I found out I don't have school! Yay. It's so much better that I didn't know and found out. Now, I'm so happy, but this won't last a day.

What's been going on lately?... Finals. That's all that needs to be said. ='[ The awful breakdown of my grades for this semester without the +/- cuz I don't know them (ughhhhhhhhhhhh. Makes me want to stab my eyes out.):

APUSH - B
APCalc AB - D..
APEng Lit - B
Physics - A (not sure cuz of the final..)
Japanese - B.........................
Photo - A.

I'm mostly disappointed with my Japanese grade, surprisingly. It should be an A, but I guess I realized too late how much I actually didn't know. I herefore vow to do at least 3 assignments of hw a week, and to .. DUN DUN DUN! STUDY! Yes. I no longer rock your world Japanese-wise. =[

Other things.. hm. Not much has happened, I guess. I think I've been getting pretty emotional lately. I don't know. Maybe the stress from finals got to me.. I don't know. I just feel pretty worthless sometimes. I don't hate living, but my life would be put to better use if I gave it to someone else. Whenever I think this, it makes me want to try more and more not to be so fucking pathetic. To anyone who reads this, please motivate me. I don't really like talking about this stuff, but just knowing that someone supports me in my attempt to be a better person, it'll make me try harder and it'll remind me of what I'm trying to do. I don't know. Say, "Fuck yeah, Michelle!" or something. A heart in there wouldn't hurt. =T

Today was the first time this weekend we went out. Crazy, huh? We went somewhere Friday, but it doesn't really count. Today, we went to the lake after stopping by Lunardi's, then to Q-Cup (dang fobs.. I thought the cigarette smoke would smother me to death.), then made our way around to pick up Lisa, and lastly to Victoria's to watch Love Me If You Dare. I liked it for the most part, but as it neared the end, it got too fucking insane. Crazy bitches. I liked the first half though.

Hrm.. anything else that's happened since I last blogged? Oh. I still don't have my iPod. I called Apple today, and they said that I have to wait cuz they're going to put a tracer on it now and e-mail me every three days, and if nothing happens, I'll get a replacement. Grrr. It's taking forFUCKINGever. =/ I spend forever on the computer just listening to music. x_x

Other small updates: oppa's coming back to the states (in fact, he's on his way already); I somehow ridiculously owe someone something that shouldn't be paid till a long while from now; I'm pretty set on trying out for Japan Bowl; I have been thinking of things I shouldn't be thinking... and now, I'm just rambling on to try and get things to put in here. Blah!

Comment. Leave some love. I heart the love. (That's a heart..)

The Only Point

Architecture In Helsinki - The Owls Go
(Good times with this one)

I should be out with friends, but I chose to stay home. Why? My dad's sick, and of course John's gonna have to go out himself, so I did't want to leave my mom home alone, but I couldn't stand just sitting and watching TV any longer, so I thought I'd work on homework, like I'd planned. It is now the new year, but what's the point? You don't get a day off on the eve or on the day of. It's just another reason for people to get drunk and touch each other, in my opinion. I guess everyone just likes to partay, so it's just another reason to have something to celebrate, but what are we celebrating exactly? A new year with new possibilities? The fading of bad memories? I really have no idea what's so important. I guess it just helps with closure and transition, but what's mostly odd for me is that I have to go to church on New Year's Eve. This is not a religious holiday at all. I'm not griping about going to church today cuz I normally have church on Saturdays, but otherwise, I'd have to go to church twice. It is only an hour since it isn't important, but why have church for New Year's anyway? It is the least bit religious. Man, it is the opposite of holy, if anything. I just don't understand. I guess it's to thank God for "a great year," and to pray for "another great year of serving Him." I have no clue. Anyway, I thought, what's the point in it for me? I always thought it was useless, but I thought about it more, and good things happened. Memories are the only reason I would partake in celebrating. On New Year's Eve, I can look back on everything I loved most, which I will do now, but on New Year's. =]

BESTS, imo:
Day Out: There's so many, like karaoke, when we all just sang in Cindy's car though we initially planned to hang out outside at the lake, our car chase; but one that still stands out has to be the interesting day spent with Tracy, Chris, and Victoria. I think we first were at Chris' with Dan, Lisa, and Cindy, but they had to leave. Then we went to what I think is a shiekh(sp?) temple in the hills. We hung out around sunset, then went to get ice cream at.. I think it's a Marble Slab. The workers thought we were loitering, I think. We got a banana split or some sundae and shared. It was good stuff. Then we went to the basketball courts at Creek. It was a windy, windy day. We sat on the bleachers and talked about interesting stuff: religion, point in life, etc. That's when I saw the world as flat and understood why people would think it's flat. I don't know how to explain it, but how the clouds moved in the sky was crazy. Tracy thought it was mind-blowing too. :D It was just interesting.. the stuff we talked about, how we spent such an awesome day. I like just talking cuz it shows you just how great your friends are.

Movies: This is going to be hard, but I'm going to try and think of all the good movies I've seen this year and list them. Crash, Saving Face, Jarhead, Thumbsucker, Harry Potter: The Goblet of Fire, Brokeback Mountain, March of the Penguins, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (reminded by Tracy),... and I'm clueless.

Dramas: Korean - My Name Is Kim Sam Soon. That's an ultimate love. Japanese - Stand Up! I love Japanese dramas cuz they're different than Korean ones and how everyone somehow has cancer. Another reason why I love My Name Is Kim Sam Soon. Sure, someone had cancer, but they already recovered from it by the time they're in the drama. :D

Album: There were a lot of upsets for me this year: Coldplay, Switchfoot, Weezer, agh. Not all CDs this year were horrible though, including Stars' Set Yourself On Fire. I'm not sure if I like Heart more, but that's not 2005 anyway. I never heard all of Hot Hot Heat's Elevator, but the parts I've heard are good, but since I never heard it all (hint hint), I can't say it's the best.

Day In: My favorite day at home would have to be.. I don't know, but the most recent one I can remember that was okay was when Duy came to visit, since that's rare. *shrug*

Book: I didn't really read any this year, but I think it would have to be East of Eden. Sure, it was assigned, but I really liked that book. I also liked The Rice Room.

Trends: Just throwing this one in, but not even I'm sure which I like. I guess, fitting clothes for guys. Not skin-tight, but fitting. Man.. whenever I see guys with tight-ass clothes on, and it's not just emo guys and their ugly pants, I cringe. For example, take that one Asian guy... you all know who I'm talking about. The one that used to make me laugh everytime I saw him. You know the one. Yeah... he's horrible.

TV Show: Hmm, I don't watch TV anymore. *think think*... Uhh.. I don't know. I think the only thing I really watch is cartoons cuz that's what's on when I first get home. I watch for a bit, then do homework. Then the best cartoon has to be.. man, Foster's, Fairly Oddparents, or Jimmy Neutron? I'd have to go with.... Foster's?

Radio Station: The one in my head. Radio can burn.

Music Video: I don't really know of any, but one I really recall is Stars' Ageless Beauty. It had the galaxy and stuff. Pretty~. Now that I think about it, Switchfoot's Stars wasn't too bad either, but whatever, I don't want to think about it.

School Moment: There's probably many more better ones than this, but after thinking about Stars, I remembered a classic moment in Japanese class. Tracy, Cindy, and I were anticipating Stars' and Death Cab for Cutie's concert. We kept singing Stars - Your Ex-Lover Is Dead, but we sang it so much that it started to wear off and we forgot how it started. Cindy hid herself in her backpack and listened to her iPod just to hear it. She got it, and we three whisper-sang it. Man, we love singing.

Period of Time: There's always a period of time where everything's just great. The best was when we went out almost everyday, school day or not, and just hung out.

Website (remembered from talking to Kenneth): This one. :D J/k. I don't know.. video.google.com? *shrug*

I'm pretty much out of bests, but let's do..
WORSTS, imo:
Day Out: This is not even questionable! WHEN WE FOUND OUT TC TEA WAS CLOSED DOWN AND REPLACED BY FUCKING WU'S! As if that wasn't disappointing enough, that pho place! AGH! I love pho, don't get me wrong, but it wasn't enjoyable since I didn't want pho, but rather TC Tea. T___T

Movies: I'm not really sure if there's any worst movie, but the most recent one is The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. Sure, I love the books (at least the ones I read), but the movie. Yes, I know it's a children-aimed movie, but the acting. Good god, the acting. Lucy, that constantly crying little girl, seriously thinks she can help in a war with leopards, lions, fauns (half men, half horse or something), polar bears, and people who actually know how to fight? Sure, if she had heat sensing missiles or something, then that's understandable, but with that puny blade? And there was a MATRIX SCENE! ARE YOU FUCKING ME?! It wasn't a horrible movie, but I just have my gripes about it. The plot was a little weak. The book was good, but the movie was a little boring at first (it's just the intro..), then it drags, and the battle scene didn't help at all like I'd hoped, and I just wished it would end. Note, as it says above, imo: in my opinion.

Dramas: Korean - Loveholic. I've seen maybe one episode, so maybe it gets better, but their teacher can fight. I also scanned a later episode, and she fights side by side with her lover. That just doesn't appeal to me. Japanese - none. I haven't seen a bad one yet, but I haven't really seen any.

Album (Upsets): Ahhh yes. This will go by how much it upsetted me because I know there are much more albums I'd hate more, like Good Charlotte, Simple Plan, etc. (I don't even know if they released new albums, but if they did, that's automatic hate.) So the big upset of the year, for me, was probably Switchfoot. It got way too blatantly Christian and could no longer appeal to the masses; just the Christians. Their single, Stars, was pretty good, but that's the only song I liked. The rest... gah. I regret downloading it even. Coldplay's X&Y is tolerable when you're not thinking about it, and I like Fix You, but it was really upsetting. Weezer's Make Believe really upset me cuz it was really nothing to compare to the Green or Blue Albums. I do like more than one song though, so it wasn't so bad. There's probably others that I can't think of... oh! Never mind! It's not Switchfoot anymore.. The All-American Rejects! That was INCREDIBLY disappointing. I didn't really expect much from Switchfoot, but it's worse than those others I listed cuz I only liked one song, but The All-American Rejects. I expected GREAT things from them. I LOVED their old album to bits! When their new album, which I don't even know the title of, released, it was a huge bummer. Their style totally changed and not even one song was good. AGH! T_____T DAMMIT!

Day In: Other than the days where I was miserably sick or had to stay home and do homework, it would have to be... when I chose to give up. That was pretty... bad.

Book: I didn't really come across any bad books this year, but the worst, though I didn't even get past the first chapter, was Moby Dick. This was also assigned. Sure, it's an American Classic or whatever because of its symbolism, but man, what an annoying book. The characters were annoying or just strange. The chapters were funky and too random. Gah. It's like To Kill A Mockingbird, which I like, but that first half has nothing to do with anything. The first half was still good reading, but it just makes you think, Get to the fucking point!

Trends: Since I already mentioned what I don't like for guys, I'll pick on female fashion. I think the worst would have to be those damn tunics. Is it a shirt, is it a dress? Make up your fucking mind.

TV Show: First, I'll go by upsets. Sadly, the first thing that comes to mind is Gilmore Girls. I love Gilmore Girls, but this new 6th season is the pits. Get it away. =[ Okay, for the actual worst show, again, imo. It has to be Laguna Beach, man. Sure, it's partially because I don't exactly love white people, but man, these are exactly the type I hate. They can't stand not shopping 24/7, they make drama and get flustered when it's their own fault,.. I don't even know what this show is, but it is fucking horrible. I watched part of one episode, and I had to change the channel. Quick.

Radio Station: Wild 94.9. 'Nuff said.

Music Video: (I think this is 2005..) Any Yellowcard video. They're all bad. Even the one they chose for their DVD (Breathing-Live Version) was a bad choice. (GO WONGFU!) The worst is Only One, and I LOVE that song, but what is this with gas, a random girl Ryan(?) seems to be singing to, random dancing people, blah. It makes no sense, it drags, and never gets better.

School Moment: Also in Japanese. Any moment where Mr. Hall is being stupid, which comes in various shades! We have bragging, lecturing over something trivial and stupid, bragging about someone else over something trivial and stupid, his constant talking (both in Japanese and in English! :D), being stubborn (lots in stock!), cutting Japanese Final Project groups down to 5 people, deciding on that stupid scoring system, and many, MANY more! Those are even worse than getting frustrated in Calc, being bored out of my mind in Physics, or being picked apart in English. I would say when my money got stolen, but I didn't find out till I was at home, so that doesn't really count as a school moment. Still, those fuckers.

Period of Time: It would have to be between The Insane Period and The Age of Sensitivity. I think it would have to be The Age of Sensitivity, cuz that actually inflicted some.. pain. ^_^;

Website: MYSPACE! Burrrnn.

And so, friends, I bid you a Happy New Year. Be sure to comment. >=[